Four secrets to being happy.

I don’t pretend to have the key to happiness, but I do know that I am a very happy and optimistic person. Ask anyone who knows me what they like most about me, and they will likely talk about how happy I always am. Someone recently asked me how I do it, so I explained it to them. I felt like it would be important to write down in case anyone could benefit from it. I also understand that depression is a real thing, and when it comes to chemical imbalances the answer is not to “just be happy” but rather to obtain proper medical help.

A big thing that takes away happiness is fear or doubt. I have seen people worry about other people so much that they cannot be happy. I have some friends that have made decisions that affect their eternal progression. However, I do not let that affect my happiness. Yes, I want them to make the right decisions, and it hurts me to see them make these hard decisions. However, my first principle to being happy is not worrying about things out of your control. I cannot control their actions. They are not my children, they are God’s children, and He is going to take care of them. I don’t want that to sound heartless. I will do everything I can to help them make the right decisions and I will still love them and be their friend, but I am not going to let their negative decisions affect my happiness. This principle of not worrying about things out of your control applies to all situations. Trials are a great example. If I got cancer, or if my mother died, I must still be happy. Yes, I can be sad and mourn in those moments, but that cannot affect my overall happiness. Circumstances do not determine happiness. Only worry about the things that you can control, and you will find a greater happiness.

The next thing that helps me to be happy is getting excited about everything. Kind of being overly optimistic. When I come home from class, I enter my apartment yelling “LET’S GO! CLASSES ARE OVER!!”, and I’ll push and shove my roommates jumping around like we won the national championship. They’ve caught on now, and they give me chest bumps and yell with me when I come in. When I leave for class in the morning, I’ll yell “LET’S GO! TIME TO LEARN SOMETHING AWESOME!” Although there isn’t a real reason to be happy for a lot of the things that I get pumped about, I think life is worth getting excited about. By raising my voice and level of enthusiasm, the atmosphere changes, and you can feel excitement enter the room. It is not fake, it is a real happiness that I bring into the room just by choosing to get excited. Music has helped me to stay excited. Almost every chance that I get, I am listening to some great music. I listen to music that pumps me up. I will beatbox or karaoke to the song, and let it enter me and get me excited about the day. I’ll get pumped up for a test, cleaning the house, going to work, or coming home from work. No matter what I am going to do, even if it is miserable, I try to get pumped about it, and it helps me to be happy through it. I try to pump up others because I know that college is hard, and everyone needs all the help they can get. I hug a lot of people too because hugs release oxytocin into the bloodstream which is the happiness drug because it reduces stress.

Probably the most important thing to being happy is being obedient to the commandments of God. One day in the mission, a lady in the store asked us how miserable we were to have to walk around all day in the rain. I told her we weren’t miserable at all, but we were very happy. She didn’t believe us. After thinking about it, I realized that while on the mission, we did not have any of what someone would think is necessary to be happy. We didn’t have family, friends, free time, technology, girlfriends, or our native food or language. However, we truly were happy. That is because we were where God wanted us. We were being obedient to his commands and that brought us happiness. Mosiah 2:41 says “Consider the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God.” That is why we can be equally happy after the mission because now we are somewhere else, but still doing what God desires us to be doing. If we remain obedient to the commandments of God, we will have happiness.

The thing that has brought me the greatest happiness lately is serving others. Some have asked me how I make time to serve others when there is so little time in college. I say that I cannot afford not to serve others, for it is what keeps me going. I don’t mean service like going and volunteering with y-serve (which is a great idea) or weeding someone’s garden (which is another great idea). I mean taking 10-15 minutes out of my day to go to someone’s apartment and give them a big hug and get them excited about the next day. Teaching someone how to do family history work. Once, I was in an apartment, and I saw that their trash was full, so I just took it out for them without saying a word. They were beyond shocked. It made me feel so good though. Little acts of service, being interested in other people’s lives, smiling and hugging others will bring a lot of happiness into your life and theirs. Dieter F. Uchtdorf once challenged us to start every day with a prayer to be led to someone that needs to be served. I have tried that challenge, and it works every time. It brings a lot of happiness because connect the service opportunity to your prayer, and you see how God is guiding your life. Feeling God’s presence in your life brings great happiness, a happiness He wishes all His children to have.